Your entire life you've......

Your whole life you've had an irrational fear of couches. I've filled this room with couches.

 

For your entire life you have been deathly afraid of cubes,

Need I say more.

 

Your entire life you were a Grammar Nazi. You now laugh at my mistake in my last post

 

For your entire life you've had an irrational fear of parties... TURN DOW FOR WHAT!

 

Your entire life you've never had a sandwich, welcome to Subway

 

Your whole life you've had an irrational fear or black people. Welcome to Detroit.

 

Your entire life you've never had a McDonalds. You just picked up a chicken mayo for 99p.

 

your entire life you've had a fear of kiwis, so we've sent you to new zealand

 

Your entire life you've had peers that killed dogs and stole hooses

 

Your entire life, you've had an irrational fear of people not getting a reference.
http://www.shadecrest.com/site/threads/6282/

 

your entire life you've been afraid of trees, so i gave you a book, about trees

Your entire life you've had a fear of using phones, you know have to get out of the matrix

(I hope someone gets this reference)

 

You're entire life you've never wanted to know how to eat a watermelon. Now you must watch this video.

 

Your entire life you've been blind, but you can see clearly now that the rain has gone.

Sent from the new and improved space phone.

 

Your entire life you hated monsters, now you listen to Rihanna and Eminem.

(Hard one, hope someone gets it.)

 

Only scrubs don't get that one ^.^

 

Your entire life you've loved oxygen. I just removed all oxygen from existence.

Cya Nerds

 

Another song-related joke:

Your whole life you've ad an irrational fear of horses, and now you're about to become Katie Perry's boyfriend.

 

I think I'll manage.

Your entire life you've been a boy. Now it is time you meet the world.

Sent from the new and improved space phone.