Although please don't mistake this for a permanent thing, I'm still saying goodbye to you all for now. There's really no way I can put this, but for the moment, I just can't. It's only in part due to recent events, but please don't blame it alone. I've been playing less and less, neglecting my duties as admin (For which I shall ask to be demoted), and it's almost impossible for me to get anything done. The spark which lead me to build fantastically has withered away. Now every time I try to build anything I just have the voice in my head screaming that it's all wrong. It's made it very difficult for me to go ingame and do things. I've been thinking about this for a few days now, and I think the best thing for me to do is just remove myself from SC entirely. I noted I was one of the most vocal people in recent events, removing myself from the equation would probably help things come along more smoothly. I intend to spend at least a month away from you all, and yes, this includes the forums. I shan't do the traditional goodbye to every single person I've ever talked to in SC, for I do intend to return one day. That said, I may still do ftb occasionally, I have rather fond memories of it and when I go on, it's not as social/populated as the other servers; and I'm still most definitely up for mp games on Steam. So long and thanks for all the fish peoples.
NOOOOO LEGEND D: Not again! What is with people?! I mean seriously siout now you! What am I ever going to do! You were the one who was left with trying to say nice things about my diamonds-stacked-on-top-of-eachother builds and you actually made me feel good about it! You promoted me twice! I understand that you need a break. Cya Legend and good luck.
Damn...well I do understand needing a break,come back when you're ready,I'll miss ya! Sent from my SPH-L900 using Tapatalk
I'm saddened to see you go, but if it's for the best then i shall live with it. Hopefully we shall meet again soon.
I won't say "g'bye" leggy, cause i know you'll be back in the future... in the mean time, thanks for the memories!! Your building style, thoughtful commentary, and unmistakable charm will reverberate here in your absence, temporary though it may be. (;
The fleeting world of minecraft serverdom needs more thoughtful gents like yourself, and will be taken aback by your sudden withdrawal. <3
Thank you all for your words. Leetle bit #Personal here I would just like to say that even if there wasn't as much drama going on, I still would've needed this break. I left because stress was starting to severely impact upon my mental well being (To the point of me feeling like I was going to break down in public), and since I've left, I have improved a lot. I was obligated to help people build, and provide services to the community, as was part of my job as admin, but every time I went to do so and then tried to build, I was met with the feelings that I described above. So I was trapped in a cycle of signing in because I must, and then signing out 15 minutes later because of self induced stress. Saying this because I need you peoples to understand that if ever feel this way, know that you can remove yourself and no one will feel any less of you for doing it. If you become addicted or feel like you have no choice but to sign in, then that's a sign that you need a break. and remember that while people can get addicted to the game, sometimes it's the community that you can't let go of.
I hear ya, man... It seems AnnodynS suffered from a similar affliction, which led to her separation from a full time admin position. It's tough for me to compare my "addiction" to gaming with real life addictions, as gaming addictions don't have any real physical drawbacks. The psychological pitfalls of gaming addiction are vast, but somewhat harmless relative to the substantial consequences of a drug or alcohol addiction. In the modern internet driven world that this generation resides in, a small supportive online community of like-minded gamers can be an irresistible attraction that may be difficult to remove oneself from voluntarily. I have felt the stress you described, leggy... but I have experienced enough life challenges to find healthy outlets for that "self-induced stress". How have I dealt with it? Well, I realized a few years ago that the game we all enjoy is enjoyable because it's a good game with or without other people to share it. For example... I learned about minecraft from a friend at work, who talked about it all the time. When I finally got a decent computer, I downloaded it (1.4, I think?) and dove into the single player knowing little to nothing about the game. The single player experience is how I've always played, and this new game was fascinating as I peeled back the layers through trial and error. When I found an online community, it totally enhanced the game for me, as all the interesting ideas and experiences I had discovered in the single player realm carried over to a like minded community of eager and energetic people. When I started building on Shadecrest, I was a true "noob", totally unaware of the complexity and expansiveness of the creative minecraft world. BUT! That was the beauty of the experience... It was because of this novice stance that I was able to churn out creation after creation, without any real fear of judgement or consequence. I was simply exploring the freedom of the creative process, and was not terribly concerned with technical details or more restrictive social norms of the existing community. That freedom allowed me to build freely, without care, driven only by my personal creative thoughts... a truly "fun" experience. That flexibility seemed to diminish as I took on more server responsibilities, and learned the more technical aspects of balanced building styles and player review criteria. It's taken a few breaks, some server hopping, and even some self-demotions on other servers to "guest status" for me to break free of that "stress induced" feeling of not being able to build creatively. In doing so, I have been able to regain some creative freedom, reduce any stressful restrictions on my time or personal style, and have seen a net gain for my personal life with a decreased feeling of obligation towards 24/7 server participation. *Having said all that: This is all kinda whiny, and I'm not sure that more level people (cough *a3, teh, dyno, qui, etc.) have experienced this type of feeling while monitoring the server? #empathy (;
also... online drama is ephemeral, and fleeting. It's not as heavy as the typed bickering might imply.
On today's episode on Dr. Trukk, Trukk talks about the long term use of minecraft and its symptoms. It may be affecting you right now. Find out more NOW! *audience applause* Sent from my PC36100 using Tapatalk 2
*looks out at audience, realizes there is no audience..* */applaud self, /slap rem* *symptoms alleviated temporarily*
"Buy Dr. trukk's motivational DVD now for only 3 low monthly installments of $299.99, *cancel anytime!" *can't cancel subscription unless trukk prescribes it, so... order now!!! xD